Flashing Lights and Caution Tape

Teaching in East New York is not your normal run of the mill teaching experience. I knew that that would probably be the case before I came out, but I was a college graduate on a mission. I was ready for an adventure and nothing could stand in my way. I was motivated and ready to make a difference. I new it would be difficult, but that didn’t stop me. I was ready…

When I accepted a teaching job in East New York last March, I quickly started to learn about the area. As I researched and talked with different people about it, I received some shivering news. I knew that the area was not quite as pretty as many other areas in New York and the poverty level was higher than most other areas, but there was one statistic that really hit me hard. East New York has the highest murder rate of any neighborhood in New York City. I think for most people that would be a bit frightening. Of course that made me a bit uneasy, but not enough to pull out. I knew that with a program like Teach For America, I would most likely be in an area like this. That’s what its all about, ensuring that children in these areas receive just an as equitable education as their peers in more affluent areas. That is what I’m here to do. However, I had an experience about a month ago that really hit me pretty hard.

In East New York, you get used to the flashing lights, the sirens, the smells, the hecklers, but there is one thing that I saw a few weeks ago that I will never get used to. The morning of September 3^rd, 2014 was just a normal morning. I woke up at 5:00, was out of my apartment by 5:30, caught the 4 train with some co-workers heading to East New York, got off at the last stop, and started the 10 minute walk to our school. It was a nice, cool morning, but there was an odd feeling about it. It seemed much quieter and still than usual. As we walked we saw flashing lights just up the street and ran right into caution tape that was stretched all the way across the road. We stepped under it and continued to walk because that was the way we got to school. Just after the caution tape, there were a number of emergency vehicles, police officers, and a small crowd gathered. Everything looked just like it was out of a movie. Then I saw the white sheet carefully draped over what looked like a person lying on the ground. What I was looking at became unmistakable when I saw the semblance of blood seeping through the sheet.

I was in shock. I knew that this area had the highest murder rate in all of New York City, but I was now witnessing it first hand. A man had been shot right down the street from my school. Shot right on the very street that I walk down everyday. I was just utterly at a loss for words. As we slowly passed through the small crowd an officer said to us, “welcome back to school teachers”. Those words rang in my head as we walked the rest of the block. I was a schoolteacher here. I teach kids that are growing up in this neighborhood. Kids that are exposed to tragedy like this, that do not have the safety and assurance that I had growing up. This was the first time that I have ever been exposed to something like that, and I sure hope that it is the last. It makes me sick to think that kids that I teach are exposed to these types of things.

This experience just made the work that I am doing so much more real. I am truly here to do what I can to give these kids an opportunity to get a good education and beat the statistics. So they do not end up like that man who I saw lying under that sheet. Or like the other man who shot him. I don’t know what kind of impact I am having on these kids right now, but I hope that I can do something to help these kids beat those odds.

I had a couple of particularly tough experiences this past week, which caused me to question my purpose here. But as I reflect on this horrific scene that I saw a few weeks ago, I am reminded of my commitment to this work. I want to do all that I can to ensure these children get the best education possible. It may be hard, but when I think about how hard my work may be, I need to remind myself of how much harder it is going to be for my kids to beat the odds that have been placed in front of them.

When my mother heard about the hard week I was having, she sent me a great quote by President Thomas S. Monson which I think is an appropriate way to end this post.

Good timber doesn’t grow with ease, the stronger the wind, the stronger the trees.

Thinking about this gives me strength to keep going and grow from this experience, but it gives me even more hope for my kids. As they face, and overcome the insurmountable odds that affront them, they will just be all the stronger for it!